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i had to turn down will and cindy for going to vegas fri-sat... i just didn't feel like going out too far... but i know where all of that is coming from. the weekend was cool... hung out with will and the family again... played lots of cards... will, his brothers, and some friends... texas hold'em, pussoi dos, blackjack, gin... fun, fun... friends came over and that was fun... everyone's cool with each other... had some drinks, ate... cards... watched family guy before KO.... family guy is so hilarious... when i try to think of my favorite parts/episodes... i just can't 'cause they're all pretty much funny. today, went to run little errands with will and cindy... went to target.. they needed some things and saw some on sale... i bought soul calibur 2 for $16.... also picked up one of those water bottles that chris has... i found a really nice teal color... of course i wanted some type of green... pigged out at a sushi bar in pasadena... had a little san soju (korean vodka)... probably the only hard liquor i can can take straight... back home to more friends and cards... haha... "good stuff... good stuff.." (old school) things aren't just flowing right... like when i have fun... i'm having fun at the moment... and then i'm back to feeling down... it's not that bad... but still... i was never like that... it's this whole thing where i feel like i lost something... when in fact... i really never had anything anyway... geez... ana maria... but i know what it is... it's just that she's so incredibly beautiful... even despite how bitter i am... or how i feel about how she's just played me (a little)... i can't deny and not say that she's one of the most beautiful girls i've seen... and i'm talking about physically and social being... of course there are lots of cute girls out there... but sometimes, i never get to see the social part of them... but heck... she's going to be some sort of model (or probably is by now)... ...where i'm going with this anyway... is that...
i liked what she presented to me... she didn't. i thought a beautiful girl like her was really interested in a guy like me... and she wasn't. there are girls i wish i had asked out... and i get held back 'cause i'm feeling under the blues about this shit... i know i gotta move... but somehow... i don't feel like i can... hopefully i can figure out what's doing this to me. all aside... tomorrow should be fun... basketball. -the cloud cannot control the direction the wind is taking it- |
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